Greetings,
I am having several problems with this car. I don't know if they are related or maybe just to tired to go on. I'll list them in the order that they started happening and hopefully someone who is a lot smarter than me can figure this out or maybe I need an exorcist.
1. Every time I take the key out of the ignition, the chime goes off like I left it in. Tried taking the "chime" fuse out, didn't help so now I leave the key in and lock all the doors.
2. Horn started blowing and would not stop with the engine off. Husband either disconnected it or pulled the fuse, not sure which.
3. Car would not start without a jump, battery tested good.
4. The door locks started to randomly engage and disengage. Pulled door lock fuse and stopped.
5. Car would not start with jump unless rocked in neutral and moved back into park.
6. Finally, the car would not start, no sound at all except for the door locks randomly engaging and disengaging, battery went dead.

If anyone has any thoughts on this, please feel free to let me know.

Thanks

 

My initial thoughts are that is one hell of a laundry list.

check the ground connection at the other end of the negative terminal cable that comes off the battery. It folds into the frame or the block I can't remember. Make sure this connection is clean. No corrosion no rust. Also check both the positive and negative cables battery cables that is for acid having wycked up into the copper of the cable. If you slice open a few inches of the insulation near the battery on each you can see if there is any brittleness to the cable which usually indicates battery acid has been sucked up into it. This will cause problems. Also check the connection where the battery connects to the under hood fuse box. It sounds like you are not getting a full 12 volts to anything. There for all kinds of things start chattering like the door locks. Also make sure your battery cable connections at the battery are clean and tight. The chime issue with the key and the ignition is caused by what's called a key minder. It is a spring loaded slider that is part of the ignition cylinder. When you put your key in you should be pushing it up and out of the way. I suspect yours is stuck in the out-of-the-way position, which will make the chime go off when you take the key out because the key minder is still in the position that it is in when a key is in the ignition.

Try getting a tube of graphite powder from home Depot. It is a small gray tube with a black top. Ask someone where it is as you will never find it on your own. Puff small amount of graphite powder into the ignition and work your key in and out at first until that is a smooth motion. Then see if you can dislodge the key minder slider which will be pushed off in one direction or the other parallel to the head of the key. You can see it much easier with the key out. When my ignition does this I put the key back in and then pull it out very rapidly. This tends to dislodge it it being the key motor and it closes properly. It may be that the spring in yours is broken but I would try dislodging it gently with something with a very narrow tip and pointy so that you do not lean into it and damage it.

Like I said earlier, if your battery tests good, chances are there is a bad connection in either the positive battery lead to somewhere or the negative lead to ground either at the battery terminals or where the other ends of the battery leads connect. As far as the battery going dead, that does not sound truly related because if the battery is not making good connection, it shouldn't drain it all. Maybe the trunk light is stuck on or something like that with a lid closed.

 

Now I have new things to try when the rain stops.

 

Your battery might be damaged (without a load test a bad battery can still appear good if you're only checking the voltage). The crazylocks probably did it.
I've had a battery killed from the crazylock behavior since it can happen randomly as you've seen and mine liked to do it during the night until the battery was dead so I couldn't get to work in the morning. A bad lock switch (a little rain getting in from an open window can do it) can cause this.
I did the exact same thing you guys did - pull a fuse. Thing is, these lock circuits can backfeed and still operate with the one fuse out. I found the second fuse but pulling left too many things non-functional. At least with the one fuse pulled it doesn't act up with the ignition off. I've noticed that if any of the locks are not quite fully locked or unlocked it will trigger more of the crazylock action so I always run the locks back and forth a couple times to make sure they all cycled completely.

Derf has the right idea for the key minder. Most of my vehicles do the same thing and the quick pull (sometimes a couple times) usually works.

Horn blowing and failure to start can also be caused by worn or damaged wiring in or near the steering column. There's a possibility that the horn could have been from a stuck relay.

Needing to rock the car and re-engage park points to a failing or an out of adjustment neutral safety switch on the transmission. Switch needs to see that tranny is in neutral or park before the engine can start.

1st priority should be obtaining a known good battery because most any other tests will depend on having a good battery installed. Derf is right about double checking the connections.

 

If your service engine soon/check engine light is on (and even if it's not) you will want to get the codes to find out more of what's going on. If you don't have access to a code reader the codes can still be read using the paper clip method.

 

Thank you for filling in the things I did not address, Jamnar. and I totally forgot about the battery drain from the switch in the middle of the night syndrome. Shame on me.

 

Ehhhh, what about the connection on the BCM? I THINK it's under the dash pad, but am not sure. IT can cause the lock issues you're having.

 

You know you just reminded me that the horn thing started after I left the windows down and a sudden rain came down. It's Florida, I should know better. lol,
Thanks.
I, also, for got to mention that we have got it to start by banging on the starter.

 

Ok, that's a new one. I talked to one person that said that if I have started it by banging on the starter, it could be the starter. I'm kinda leaning toward connections and battery. The wiring and all of that is most likely 21 years old. The car does not have 100k miles.

 

Paper clip method. I have to google that one.

Thanks