has anyone done this?
#21
05-08-2015, 06:52 PM
I haven't really been single since I was 17...I was single for about 6 months before I met my boyfriend...it was fun...but I did miss the cuddling and stuff. Idk...I chose to have my son young because my parents were both older when they had me and Idk they still didn't havr their lives together lol. Have fun while you're young and get your **** together. I wish I would havr gotten my career under me before I had kids but my ex didn't support me and I just let it go. I miss it and hope in the next couple years to succeed in my career. My kids may not have everything in the world or everything they want but they have a mama who loves them more than anyone in this world.
#22
05-09-2015, 12:41 AM
It's refreshing to know that there are young parents out there that GET it. The GET what's important in life. Not a $200 toy. Not a $500 cellphone. What's important is taking AND INDEFINITELY COMMITTING to raising your children to respect OTHERS, respect YOU (their PARENTS), respect AUTTHORITY, and to respect THEMSELVES.
I'm about twice as old as the rest of you in this discussion, so here's some perspective from the previous generation
:
When I was young, we stood at the bus stop alone; we played in the yard, in the nearby ball fields, etc unsupervised (when we were old enough)
We walked to and from school alone. Our parents didn't have guns in the house. Yes there were break ins, but they were to steal property, not to kill. Granted I grew up in a very nice suburb of Philly.
But my point is: (when I was raised)
----Your parents were your PARENTS---not your best friends. I see this all the time today. These children grow up with no limits and will eventually be blindsided by life, compliments of their parents.
----You RESPECTED AUTHORITY. Be it teachers, police officers, whomever. The thought of walking up to the front of the classroom and getting in the teacher's face, or acting out in class and refusing to settle down and obey as you're told ---NEVER did that happen. Maybe I was a bit sheltered, but the concept never crossed the mind of any child raised right. Again, NO LIMITS. Instead of pushing the limits at home while growing up, crossing the line, and getting punished at home, the parents take no responsibility for setting limits for their children -- yet they demand to know what Jason did to provoke the math teacher to put him in a half nelson and call the police. ****ing hypocrites.
What I see: Of your generation, I see what appear to be alot of generally unmotivated young people who have the potential to excel in all kinds of professions, but their parents apparently never taught them to RESPECT THEMSELVES enough to want more out of life than the easiest thing in front of them. I don't think they believe in themselves and many have such low self esteem that they aren't motivated to better themselves or their situation.
Sorry, that's been built up for like 10 years....
Goalie--you have a pretty firm grasp on where you are now, WHY you don't want to be dating, and you're pointed in a forward direction
Bones -- you are with the one you love, and are balancing family life with your Ion and many other things I'm sure. College is not for everyone. You gave it a try. Better to find out sooner than later.
Mandee -- you seem to be weathering a continual ****storm that life has been throwing your way for many years now. You realized your child and your sanity were worth more than misery and a ring, so you moved on. I wish more people had the guts to do that. Now you have a new beau, 2 kids, one with medical issues that you recognized were serious and addressed right away, and a broken down Ion. Which your Saturnforum family has tried to help you to remedy.
Everything put together may push you near your limits, but you never give in. You keep your wits about you and you just keep on raising those kids, teaching them something new every day. I'm sure your older boy is learning about limits right about now -- and he ain't too happy. Sounds like you have parts for the car.....
_____________
My wife does not understand how much you folks (all of you regulars) mean to me and therefore I get yelled at for spending too much time on this forum. I don't do it in place of spending time with her unless she needs some private quiet time -- which everyone does and I have no issues with.
Oh back to the topic -- yes bones it is indeed VERY different with different partners. The dynamic of the relationship, the "chemistry" between you (or lack thereof), likes n dislikes.......I'm not suggesting you should go cheat on your wife. NO. If you're happy with what you have right now you're luckier than the majority of people in relationships.
As for "window shopping" -- the rule is "look but don't touch"--meaning look but don't ogle, stare, drool, or get a hard on in public. My wife will often point out guys and ask me if I think they are attractive. 90% I say not really. Which Makes me wonder how she ended up with me. I do the same with women. No big deal. We are comfortable and secure enough in our relationship that window shopping in a mall is not going to cause conflict. Of course we've been married 17 years and I met her when I was 18. (long period of no contact in there).
Warning--years 6-11 will test both of you regarding your willingness to compromise to stay together. You'll want different things 10 years from now.
Man that was tiring. I wrote it all stream of consciousness in one uninterrupted sitting.
I'm about twice as old as the rest of you in this discussion, so here's some perspective from the previous generation
:
When I was young, we stood at the bus stop alone; we played in the yard, in the nearby ball fields, etc unsupervised (when we were old enough)
We walked to and from school alone. Our parents didn't have guns in the house. Yes there were break ins, but they were to steal property, not to kill. Granted I grew up in a very nice suburb of Philly.
But my point is: (when I was raised)
----Your parents were your PARENTS---not your best friends. I see this all the time today. These children grow up with no limits and will eventually be blindsided by life, compliments of their parents.
----You RESPECTED AUTHORITY. Be it teachers, police officers, whomever. The thought of walking up to the front of the classroom and getting in the teacher's face, or acting out in class and refusing to settle down and obey as you're told ---NEVER did that happen. Maybe I was a bit sheltered, but the concept never crossed the mind of any child raised right. Again, NO LIMITS. Instead of pushing the limits at home while growing up, crossing the line, and getting punished at home, the parents take no responsibility for setting limits for their children -- yet they demand to know what Jason did to provoke the math teacher to put him in a half nelson and call the police. ****ing hypocrites.
What I see: Of your generation, I see what appear to be alot of generally unmotivated young people who have the potential to excel in all kinds of professions, but their parents apparently never taught them to RESPECT THEMSELVES enough to want more out of life than the easiest thing in front of them. I don't think they believe in themselves and many have such low self esteem that they aren't motivated to better themselves or their situation.
Sorry, that's been built up for like 10 years....
Goalie--you have a pretty firm grasp on where you are now, WHY you don't want to be dating, and you're pointed in a forward direction
Bones -- you are with the one you love, and are balancing family life with your Ion and many other things I'm sure. College is not for everyone. You gave it a try. Better to find out sooner than later.
Mandee -- you seem to be weathering a continual ****storm that life has been throwing your way for many years now. You realized your child and your sanity were worth more than misery and a ring, so you moved on. I wish more people had the guts to do that. Now you have a new beau, 2 kids, one with medical issues that you recognized were serious and addressed right away, and a broken down Ion. Which your Saturnforum family has tried to help you to remedy.
Everything put together may push you near your limits, but you never give in. You keep your wits about you and you just keep on raising those kids, teaching them something new every day. I'm sure your older boy is learning about limits right about now -- and he ain't too happy. Sounds like you have parts for the car.....
_____________
My wife does not understand how much you folks (all of you regulars) mean to me and therefore I get yelled at for spending too much time on this forum. I don't do it in place of spending time with her unless she needs some private quiet time -- which everyone does and I have no issues with.
Oh back to the topic -- yes bones it is indeed VERY different with different partners. The dynamic of the relationship, the "chemistry" between you (or lack thereof), likes n dislikes.......I'm not suggesting you should go cheat on your wife. NO. If you're happy with what you have right now you're luckier than the majority of people in relationships.
As for "window shopping" -- the rule is "look but don't touch"--meaning look but don't ogle, stare, drool, or get a hard on in public. My wife will often point out guys and ask me if I think they are attractive. 90% I say not really. Which Makes me wonder how she ended up with me. I do the same with women. No big deal. We are comfortable and secure enough in our relationship that window shopping in a mall is not going to cause conflict. Of course we've been married 17 years and I met her when I was 18. (long period of no contact in there).
Warning--years 6-11 will test both of you regarding your willingness to compromise to stay together. You'll want different things 10 years from now.
Man that was tiring. I wrote it all stream of consciousness in one uninterrupted sitting.
Last edited by derf; 05-09-2015 at 07:58 AM. Reason: grammar, but most importantly, adding "not" to the sentence abt. bones cheating
#24
05-09-2015, 09:34 AM
You are absolutely right with todays society. Honestly, it makes me sick.
Parents are to worried about impressing/out-doing the family next door, making sure their kids have the newest cell phone, shoes, etc.
Yes, I get the whole rebellion thing. I did that when I was 16-18, but respect goes a long way. Walking around thinking youre better than everyone, with no concept of reality is going to break someone quicker than they know it.
Now, I cant just truly says its "my generation". I work with people between 35-45 who act just like that. Have a $500 cell phone, but their electric is getting turned off.
Cant afford gas to make it to work, because they wanted to buy drugs instead.
People ask me all the time how I got so far in so little time.
Simple.
I definitely was not the best kid, but my parents raised me well. They put a roof over my head, food on the table, and clothes on my back. They did what they were supposed to do in an affordable matter.
By 16 I was working full time while going to school. Mom gave me no choice but to learn the value of a dollar. She wouldn't buy me the fancy crap you see people walking around with. If I wanted it, I h,ad to work for it.
I really believe respect and hard work gets you a long way.
No, I didn't go to college like I should have, which mom and dad still aren't happy about, but I didn't sit around on my *** right after I graduated high school. They are proud of me for what I have accomplished at my job, and that I am making something out of it.
I really hope I do not offend anyone with this next comment, but I don't think anyone here is old enough.
I seriously do believe though that the "baby boomer" generation was the start to leading society to where it is today. Not blaming it on the WHOLE group, but enough to make a difference.
I'm a realist. I am not going to beat around the bush. If people want respect, you better earn it.
Parents are to worried about impressing/out-doing the family next door, making sure their kids have the newest cell phone, shoes, etc.
Yes, I get the whole rebellion thing. I did that when I was 16-18, but respect goes a long way. Walking around thinking youre better than everyone, with no concept of reality is going to break someone quicker than they know it.
Now, I cant just truly says its "my generation". I work with people between 35-45 who act just like that. Have a $500 cell phone, but their electric is getting turned off.
Cant afford gas to make it to work, because they wanted to buy drugs instead.
People ask me all the time how I got so far in so little time.
Simple.
I definitely was not the best kid, but my parents raised me well. They put a roof over my head, food on the table, and clothes on my back. They did what they were supposed to do in an affordable matter.
By 16 I was working full time while going to school. Mom gave me no choice but to learn the value of a dollar. She wouldn't buy me the fancy crap you see people walking around with. If I wanted it, I h,ad to work for it.
I really believe respect and hard work gets you a long way.
No, I didn't go to college like I should have, which mom and dad still aren't happy about, but I didn't sit around on my *** right after I graduated high school. They are proud of me for what I have accomplished at my job, and that I am making something out of it.
I really hope I do not offend anyone with this next comment, but I don't think anyone here is old enough.
I seriously do believe though that the "baby boomer" generation was the start to leading society to where it is today. Not blaming it on the WHOLE group, but enough to make a difference.
I'm a realist. I am not going to beat around the bush. If people want respect, you better earn it.
#25
05-09-2015, 03:48 PM
I did my fair share of trouble making and ****...but I also make sure everyone is fine around me...worry about them before me. Idk...I grew up in a ****ed up situation...I'm not going to let my child grow up in a ****ed up situation. I'm tired of the kids a little younger than me becoming adults and thinking they are some real deal gangsters and don't know **** about life. I see kids with 200$ shoes and mommy and daddy bought them a brand new truck...nope not happening.
I will match my kids money wise for their first car...if they save $2000 ill give them 2000 but I'm not going out of my way to bust my *** for them to have the best of best if they aren't going to treat it with respect. Everything I have I earned on my own.
And thank yall for the help with my car.
I will match my kids money wise for their first car...if they save $2000 ill give them 2000 but I'm not going out of my way to bust my *** for them to have the best of best if they aren't going to treat it with respect. Everything I have I earned on my own.
And thank yall for the help with my car.
#26
05-09-2015, 06:36 PM
It's refreshing to know that there are young parents out there that GET it. The GET what's important in life. Not a $200 toy. Not a $500 cellphone. What's important is taking AND INDEFINITELY COMMITTING to raising your children to respect OTHERS, respect YOU (their PARENTS), respect AUTTHORITY, and to respect THEMSELVES.
When I was young, we stood at the bus stop alone; we played in the yard, in the nearby ball fields, etc unsupervised (when we were old enough)
We walked to and from school alone.
Bones -- you are with the one you love, and are balancing family life with your Ion and many other things I'm sure. College is not for everyone. You gave it a try. Better to find out sooner than later.
Everything put together may push you near your limits, but you never give in. You keep your wits about you and you just keep on raising those kids, teaching them something new every day. I'm sure your older boy is learning about limits right about now -- and he ain't too happy. Sounds like you have parts for the car.....
_____________
My wife does not understand how much you folks (all of you regulars) mean to me and therefore I get yelled at for spending too much time on this forum. I don't do it in place of spending time with her unless she needs some private quiet time -- which everyone does and I have no issues with.
Oh back to the topic -- yes bones it is indeed VERY different with different partners. The dynamic of the relationship, the "chemistry" between you (or lack thereof), likes n dislikes.......I'm not suggesting you should go cheat on your wife. NO. If you're happy with what you have right now you're luckier than the majority of people in relationships.
As for "window shopping" -- the rule is "look but don't touch"--meaning look but don't ogle, stare, drool, or get a hard on in public. My wife will often point out guys and ask me if I think they are attractive. 90% I say not really. Which Makes me wonder how she ended up with me. I do the same with women. No big deal. We are comfortable and secure enough in our relationship that window shopping in a mall is not going to cause conflict. Of course we've been married 17 years and I met her when I was 18. (long period of no contact in there).
Warning--years 6-11 will test both of you regarding your willingness to compromise to stay together. You'll want different things 10 years from now.
When I was young, we stood at the bus stop alone; we played in the yard, in the nearby ball fields, etc unsupervised (when we were old enough)
We walked to and from school alone.
Originally Posted by derf
But my point is: (when I was raised)
----Your parents were your PARENTS---not your best friends. I see this all the time today. These children grow up with no limits and will eventually be blindsided by life, compliments of their parents.
----You RESPECTED AUTHORITY. Be it teachers, police officers, whomever. The thought of walking up to the front of the classroom and getting in the teacher's face, or acting out in class and refusing to settle down and obey as you're told ---NEVER did that happen. Maybe I was a bit sheltered, but the concept never crossed the mind of any child raised right. Again, NO LIMITS. Instead of pushing the limits at home while growing up, crossing the line, and getting punished at home, the parents take no responsibility for setting limits for their children -- yet they demand to know what Jason did to provoke the math teacher to put him in a half nelson and call the police. ****ing hypocrites.
----Your parents were your PARENTS---not your best friends. I see this all the time today. These children grow up with no limits and will eventually be blindsided by life, compliments of their parents.
----You RESPECTED AUTHORITY. Be it teachers, police officers, whomever. The thought of walking up to the front of the classroom and getting in the teacher's face, or acting out in class and refusing to settle down and obey as you're told ---NEVER did that happen. Maybe I was a bit sheltered, but the concept never crossed the mind of any child raised right. Again, NO LIMITS. Instead of pushing the limits at home while growing up, crossing the line, and getting punished at home, the parents take no responsibility for setting limits for their children -- yet they demand to know what Jason did to provoke the math teacher to put him in a half nelson and call the police. ****ing hypocrites.
Bones -- you are with the one you love, and are balancing family life with your Ion and many other things I'm sure. College is not for everyone. You gave it a try. Better to find out sooner than later.
Everything put together may push you near your limits, but you never give in. You keep your wits about you and you just keep on raising those kids, teaching them something new every day. I'm sure your older boy is learning about limits right about now -- and he ain't too happy. Sounds like you have parts for the car.....
_____________
My wife does not understand how much you folks (all of you regulars) mean to me and therefore I get yelled at for spending too much time on this forum. I don't do it in place of spending time with her unless she needs some private quiet time -- which everyone does and I have no issues with.
Oh back to the topic -- yes bones it is indeed VERY different with different partners. The dynamic of the relationship, the "chemistry" between you (or lack thereof), likes n dislikes.......I'm not suggesting you should go cheat on your wife. NO. If you're happy with what you have right now you're luckier than the majority of people in relationships.
As for "window shopping" -- the rule is "look but don't touch"--meaning look but don't ogle, stare, drool, or get a hard on in public. My wife will often point out guys and ask me if I think they are attractive. 90% I say not really. Which Makes me wonder how she ended up with me. I do the same with women. No big deal. We are comfortable and secure enough in our relationship that window shopping in a mall is not going to cause conflict. Of course we've been married 17 years and I met her when I was 18. (long period of no contact in there).
Warning--years 6-11 will test both of you regarding your willingness to compromise to stay together. You'll want different things 10 years from now.
My failure to finish college was purely financial. I chose to support my family instead of watching us rolling pennies for gas...
You are absolutely right with todays society. Honestly, it makes me sick.
Parents are to worried about impressing/out-doing the family next door, making sure their kids have the newest cell phone, shoes, etc.
Now, I cant just truly says its "my generation". I work with people between 35-45 who act just like that. Have a $500 cell phone, but their electric is getting turned off.
Cant afford gas to make it to work, because they wanted to buy drugs instead.
People ask me all the time how I got so far in so little time.
Simple.
By 16 I was working full time while going to school. Mom gave me no choice but to learn the value of a dollar. She wouldn't buy me the fancy crap you see people walking around with. If I wanted it, I had to work for it.
I really believe respect and hard work gets you a long way.
Parents are to worried about impressing/out-doing the family next door, making sure their kids have the newest cell phone, shoes, etc.
Now, I cant just truly says its "my generation". I work with people between 35-45 who act just like that. Have a $500 cell phone, but their electric is getting turned off.
Cant afford gas to make it to work, because they wanted to buy drugs instead.
People ask me all the time how I got so far in so little time.
Simple.
By 16 I was working full time while going to school. Mom gave me no choice but to learn the value of a dollar. She wouldn't buy me the fancy crap you see people walking around with. If I wanted it, I had to work for it.
I really believe respect and hard work gets you a long way.
I'm tired of the kids a little younger than me becoming adults and thinking they are some real deal gangsters and don't know **** about life. I see kids with 200$ shoes and mommy and daddy bought them a brand new truck...nope not happening.
I'm not going out of my way to bust my *** for them to have the best of best if they aren't going to treat it with respect. Everything I have I earned on my own.
And thank yall for the help with my car.
I'm not going out of my way to bust my *** for them to have the best of best if they aren't going to treat it with respect. Everything I have I earned on my own.
And thank yall for the help with my car.
I watched in disgust as classmates did thousands of dollars in damage from abuse to a brand new $40k truck, and daddy footed the bill as always... I can't imagine how a current MY truck can need $3147 in maintenance(he showed me the bill), but the guy didn't deserve to be driving it...
Last edited by 19bonestock88; 05-09-2015 at 06:39 PM.
#28
05-10-2015, 10:30 AM
I thought it was... The guy said the truck had 18,000 miles at the time...
The bill went something like:
4 tires
4 shocks
Front pads and rotors
Rear pads and drums(yes there were drums on the bill, I'm positive)
Maybe ball joints? I can't remember...
The point is that a 2011 GMC Sierra needed all the above at 18k miles! Keep in mind that this was in May 2011...
I remember this so clearly because at that point I decided my children are absolutely NOT getting new vehicles, in fact, I plan on passing along an older vehicle... It will be safe/reliable at the start, but they will be responsible for upkeep and maintenance, just as I was...
The bill went something like:
4 tires
4 shocks
Front pads and rotors
Rear pads and drums(yes there were drums on the bill, I'm positive)
Maybe ball joints? I can't remember...
The point is that a 2011 GMC Sierra needed all the above at 18k miles! Keep in mind that this was in May 2011...
I remember this so clearly because at that point I decided my children are absolutely NOT getting new vehicles, in fact, I plan on passing along an older vehicle... It will be safe/reliable at the start, but they will be responsible for upkeep and maintenance, just as I was...
#30
05-10-2015, 11:09 PM
I will have to read all the previous posts, but short and sweet. I am 59, married for 35 years, 6 children, 15 grandchildren , professional mechanic. Happy with my "new" Saturn, going up to Portland to pick up a used tow bar and stopping by Roadmaster for the missing pieces so I can tow my car. Roadmaster makes tow bars and install kits to flat tow almost any car or truck.
Last edited by 02 LW300; 05-10-2015 at 11:11 PM. Reason: iPad auto correct